signup
for email updates
Directory
Our
Archive: 2001-2004
Cover
Art Archive
Search
|
Life-after-death experiences
bolster author of Life Without Lisa
Experiences confirm that his dead wife is still very nuch alive
by Jill Lawrence
Regardless of how rock-solid a person's belief in life after death is, when a loved
one dies, the loss is very real and emotionally devastating. The loss of physical
contact, and the inability to have meaningful, fulfilling conversation, often is
overwhelming. The knowledge that the loved one survived so-called death and lives
on in spirit is affirming, but it does not negate the real loss experienced on the
earth plane.
When Lisa Ballo died from cancer at age 38, despite the fact that both she and husband
Rich believed that life goes on and had studied many spiritual, metaphysical and
alternative approaches to life and health, Rich was utterly desolated. His beloved
Lisa was no longer sharing his bed, his dreams and plans. Suddenly it was just Rich,
who single-handedly had the daunting responsibility of raising his 5- and 6-year-old
sons.
Despite the fact that Rich didn't think he could go on and often didn't want to,
he somehow survived the leaden days that followed Lisa's death. He didn't think it
would be possible for him to ever piece a meaningful life together again. He doubted
he could ever enjoy so much as shared laughter or any sweet moment of life.
As a professional writer, Rich recorded his personal journey by committing his thoughts
on paper. Little did he know that his journal would become the basis for a book entitled
Life Without Lisa: A Widowed Father's Compelling Journey Through the Rough Seas of
Grief (Quality of Life Publishing).
The spirit world
In the book, Rich candidly shares the healing process he went through, as well as
some of the visitations he had from his wife after her death. Both Lisa and Rich
firmly believed in life after death and his experiences with Lisa from the spirit
world profoundly reinforced his belief.
"I know that my wife Lisa's spirit still influences me and is still around even
though she 'died' in 1993," Rich emphasizes. "Since then, Lisa has come
to me mostly in my dreams. Her appearances helped me accept the fact that her soul
determined that she had to go to the other side. For whatever reasons, this is the
path her soul intended."
Rich explains that it wasn't just wishful thinking that brought these experiences
to him.
"No matter how hard I wished her to appear and tried to will a visitation from
her, I could not force it to happen," he assures. Instead, according to Rich,
she just spontaneously appeared at various times without his bidding.
He said he was comforted when she appeared to him. They would hug, but all too soon
she would tell him that she had to go. He'd say, "Okay," even though he
didn't want her to leave, but he knew she had to go. He had a couple of extremely
vivid experiences like that. Those were early on within the first year after her
death.
Once Lisa appeared in his bedroom in Florida. According to Rich's account, Lisa came
and sat on the bed beside him. She was naked, but the only thing he could really
see were the surgical scars on her abdomen that had resulted from multiple surgeries
to remove various tumors. It was a very vivid and a somewhat disquieting visitation
for Rich.
After Lisa was diagnosed with cancer, she and Rich searched for answers and healing
therapies.
"We went to Sedona to experience the energy vortexes," he said. "I
had my palm read and she had her aura read. The guy told her that her aura was the
strangest one he had ever seen, because it was bright white light from the shoulders
up. This was eight months before she died. He was probably seeing her close connection
to the spirit world and her imminent return to spirit."
Extend her life
Actually, a variety of therapies did extend her life, Rich believes. The two studied
and participated in meditation, Reiki, Hemi-Sync® at the Monroe Institute, acupuncture,
sound therapy, light therapy and ayurveda with Deepak Chopra at the Lancaster, Mass.,
center he led at the time. She took vitamins and practiced Silva Mind Control methods.
Lisa Ballo was diagnosed with a cancerous tumor on her 35th birthday, yet she lived
to the end of her 38th year, just before she turned 39.
"I am convinced all these alternative treatments benefited her," Rich said,
"because her cancer had metastasized into her reproductive organs just a couple
of weeks after diagnosis -- it was very fast moving. After that, she went full force
into all these different well-being approaches and lived almost another four years."
A woman they knew of with the same type cancer who did not pursue alternative therapies
died within six months of diagnosis.
Since her death, Lisa's presence has become apparent to Rich in a variety of ways,
not just through dreams and visitations.
One day just prior to publishing Life Without Lisa, publisher Karla Wheeler was on
her way to the office when she felt compelled to turn on the radio, something she
rarely did while driving, as she preferred to drive in silence. At that very moment,
a favorite song of Karla's was playing. It was Anne Murray's "Can I Have This
Dance for the Rest of My Life?" Karla was struck by the fact that she must stop
the presses, for Life Without Lisa couldn't go to print until the book gave readers
personal glimpses of Lisa, such as her favorite songs, ice cream flavors, reading
material and taste in clothing.
Later that morning, Karla asked Rich if they could insert a few descriptions of Lisa's
preferences. She explained what prompted her to make major changes in the book at
the eleventh hour.
"I almost fell out of my chair," Rich said. "I was almost breathless
as I stammered out that Lisa loved that song so much that we chose it as our wedding
song! Karla was deeply touched by this synchronicity and told me she was convinced
this was not mere coincidence, that she felt Lisa's spirit guiding every step of
the publishing process. Needless to say, Lisa's likes and preferences were inserted
throughout the book, which we've been told adds to the book's readership appeal."
A bright light
Another "not a mere coincidence" involved the photograph used on the cover
of the book. Rich and his publisher decided to select a lighthouse for the cover,
because it was symbolic of Lisa's having been a bright light to so many people.
Rich asked Allan Wood, a photographer who specializes in lighthouses -- and Lisa's
friend in high school who became Rich's friend, as well -- if he and Karla could
look at some of his shots and consider publishing one on the book cover. Allan sent
about 20 lighthouse photos from which to choose. Rich and Karla picked the one that's
on the cover because it had so much feeling to it. They thought it characterized
the conflict within Rich that is presented in the book, representing so many facets
of the process he went through: flowing water, yet rough seas; cloudy skies with
a chance of clearing and sunshine; jagged rocks in foreground, yet the comfort of
a lighthouse in the background.
Weeks later when Rich visited Allan in his office to give him a copy of the book,
Rich happened to notice an enlarged, framed version of the photo hanging on his wall.
"It dawned on me," Rich said, "that this particular lighthouse bore
a striking resemblance to the one on Lisa's headstone (on page 207 of the book).
Allan and I wondered if it could possibly be the same lighthouse."
Rich visited the headstone company where he bought the gravestone and asked them
if they could find the lighthouse on which the etching was based. A few days later,
Karla received a phone call, saying the lighthouse used as the model for the headstone
etching was Portland Head Light in Cape Elizabeth, Maine -- the same one featured
on the front cover of Life Without Lisa!
"We were amazed by the news and could only conclude that Lisa had orchestrated
the whole thing from the other side," Rich said, "because the lighthouse
chosen for the book cover was identical to that of her tombstone! After all, I had
never been to that lighthouse and I didn't pick out the gravestone; our sons did.
I had no idea they were the same exact lighthouse.
"I am certain Lisa's spirit was there with the kids when they picked out the
headstone, with Allan when he sent the lighthouse photos, and with Karla and me when
we pondered the photographs. Lisa's presence from the other side reaffirmed that
our decision on that particular photograph for the cover was her preference. She
was still being a light guiding our way."
Jill Lawrence is an editor and account executive with Quality of Life Publishing
Co. Life
Without Lisa: A Widowed Father's Compelling Journey Through the Rough Seas of Grief,
by Richard Ballo, is available in bookstores now. For more information, please visit
www.qolpublishing.com/BookDescriptionLisa.htm, e-mail jlawrence@QoLpublishing.com
or call toll-free 1 (877) 513-0099.
Copyright © Quality of Life Publishing Co. All rights reserved. |
| July 2005 |
|
|
