| Take a Load Off!ª Use The Mind/Body Connection To Gain Happiness And Lose Weight Without Dieting! by Robin L. Silverman Jeanne was frustrated. "I've tried every diet there is. High carb, low carb, no carb, portion control, counting calories -- I hate them all. The more I try to restrict what I eat, the more weight I gain!" "There's a secret reason and a not-so-secret reason why that's so," I said. "Oh, yeah?" she snapped. "The not-so-secret reason is pure science. Whenever we are under stress, including the stress of trying to lose weight, our adrenal glands release a chemical called cortisol. Cortisol acts like cortizone. Over time, it causes muscle wasting, insulin resistance and fat storage. Because a pound of muscle uses 35-50 calories a day and a pound of fat uses a mere two, just THINKING stressfully about food reduces your metabolism. As your cells become more insulin resistant, they burn carbs and sugars less efficiently, which actually makes you crave more carbs! Then your fat cells get totally confused, and hold on to every single calorie because they think you're starving." "All that from simply stressing out about food?" I nodded. "But cortisol control isn't the only challenge. There's a universal law that comes into play: 'Whatever you resist, persists.' In other words, the more you say or think, 'I don't want to be fat!' the more the fat will cling to you. There's another way to say it: 'You can't get enough of what you don't want.'" She looked as if she might cry. "So now I can't eat anything, and I also can't even think about it? Give me a break!" "There is another way," I said. "But in order for it to succeed, you have to be willing to do something that's incredibly hard for people to do." "Gastric bypass?" I shook my head. "Oh, no! I said 'hard,' not 'drastic.'" "What's that?" I smiled. "You have to be willing to be happy." "Be happy? ARE YOU KIDDING? So you're telling me to be 'fat and happy,' or happy that I'm fat?" "Absolutely not," I answered. "I'm telling you that if you want to be thinner, you're going to have to take a load off your mind by gaining something satisfying that you don't have now." She seemed curious. "Like what?" "Only you know that," I said. "Think for a minute. What's something that makes you feel as if you're carrying the 'weight of the world' on your shoulders?" She got quiet. "My job. I'm always working overtime because these kids they hire are so unreliable. If one of the staff doesn't come in, I have to stay for another shift. And there's no overtime when I do, because I'm a manager. I've talked to my supervisor about it more than once. He says that his hands are tied, because the floor has to be covered." "So do you want more money?" I asked. "Not really," she said. "At this point, I'd just like to be able to go home at the end of my shift and have dinner with my husband. And I want to take a walk after dinner. Right now, I'm too exhausted to even consider that." "Sounds like a plan," I said. "That's the point. I can't plan it. And because I can't, even on the nights that I can go home, I'm so mentally whipped from worrying about whether or not my replacement is coming in that I flop into a chair after warming up some canned or frozen food." I could see she had what she needed for a breakthrough: a situation that was so negative that either she changed it for the better, or it would surely change her health and her life for the worse. "Let me tell you about two universal laws," I said. "The first is: 'You attract what you are, not what you want.' And the second is, "When you pay attention to your life, good things happen.'" "What's that supposed to mean?" "That means you can say, 'I want to go home!' all you want, but if you believe that you're going to have to stay at work, you'll actually attract co-workers and situations that make it impossible for you to leave. So that's why I mention the second one. Let's pay attention to your life and your happiness, and watch what happens. Tell me how you would feel if you knew you could reliably leave work every day at the end of your shift." She straightened up. "Are you kidding? Fantastic!" "What would your husband say if you told him you could be home every night?" "'That's great!'" "And what would happen to your dinner?" She was smiling now. "Oh, I could actually cook something I liked!" I could see she was on a roll. "What about that walk?" "My husband would probably come with me!" "And what do you think would be the result after a month or so of this?" She relaxed. "I'd feel great, and I bet I'd lose a few pounds." I saw Jeanne a week later. She walked into class grinning like the cat who ate the canary. "What's up with you?" I asked. "I did it!" she said proudly. "I walked into my boss's office and said, 'You know what? I think I'd like to be demoted! He couldn't believe it, but I said that from now on, I just wanted to work shifts, like everyone else.' I lost a little pay, but so what? The last week has been fantastic. I'm not dieting any more -- just being sensible. I'm walking, I'm spending time with my husband, and I'm sleeping like a baby. I think I lost a couple of pounds, since my waistbands feel looser, but you know what? I haven't stepped on the scale this week. How's THAT for taking a load off?" I had no doubt that Jeanne's weight would eventually stabilize at a level that was normal and healthy for her. For she had learned not only the first secret about taking a load off, but the second: Weight loss is not so much about what you eat as revealing who you are. The way you do that is by using your 10 inner gifts to clarify and take action on what feels right and good to you. The 10 gifts are treasures that we all have, given to us by our creator at birth. They act as an inner compass in times of trouble, and as a road map when we are ready for new opportunities. Using each one replaces a load with some lightness, freedom and fun. They work on both the physical and metaphysical planes simultaneously by employing the laws of quantum physics. Each of the 10 gifts comes with a question you can ask yourself. They are: The gift of Intention -- What can I do that reflects my values? The gift of Thanks -- What can I share with others that demonstrates gratitude for what I have already received? The gift of Trust -- What does the still, small voice inside me say about this? The gift of Character -- What role do I want to play in the outcome? The gift of Joy -- What is happening here and now that is pleasing to me? The gift of Unity -- Who can help me create something bigger than what I can imagine or do alone? The gift of Courage -- What would be fun to try? The gift of Dreams -- Can I fully imagine the result I want before I begin? The gift of Love -- What beauty or good do I see in myself and others? The gift of Faith -- What problem or opportunity am I willing to surrender to God? I worked with Clark recently. He was young but at least 75 pounds overweight, a problem compounded by the fact that he was a professional chef. He said it was his routine to open the refrigerator every 15 minutes, whether he was cooking or not. Clark told me he wanted to lose weight so he could have more energy. "To do your work?" I asked. "No, to go hiking with my kids. Right now, they think that all I'm good for is sitting around in a chair. Truth be told, I worry that they might be right. I don't think I could keep up with them. And, God forbid, I might even have a heart attack on the trail, and they wouldn't know what to do." "You seem to have a good imagination," I said. "Let's use your gift of dreams to help you lose weight." "How do you do that?" "Pretend that you've already lost weight, and that you rewarded yourself by taking your kids hiking yesterday. Now tell me: Where did you go?" He wrinkled his brow. "Let me see. How about Itasca State Park?" "Are you asking me or telling me?" I teased. "Oh yeah, that's right. I'm telling you! OK, we went to Itasca." "What did you do?" "Well, we hiked the trails for about two hours, and climbed up the old watchtower. I could never, ever have done that many steps before I lost weight! Even my kids were amazed that I wasn't huffing and puffing by the time we got to the top. Then we jumped across the Mississippi River at its source -- it was only a few feet, but even my son said, 'Way to go, Dad!'" "Where did you eat?" "We brought a picnic basket and ate right there. It was all good stuff, except maybe the hot dogs." He gave me a knowing wink. "But since I lost the weight, I realized that I could have even the so-called 'bad' things once in a while." He was on a roll, so I simply suggested that he use his gift of dreams to divert his attention whenever he found himself in front of the refrigerator. I saw Clark three weeks later. "The gift of Dreams really helped," he said, "but so did the universal law about 'whatever you do may be very insignificant, but it's very important that you do it.'" "What did you do?" "I realized that two tiny changes might make a great big difference in my overeating," he said. "The first was that I started asking myself, 'What am I looking for?' every time I opened the refrigerator. When I realized that my kids and the fun we would have together weren't in there, I found it easier to shut the door. The other thing I discovered was that the earlier I came to work, the more I ate. So now I'm on time, but only by minutes, not an hour or more." When Clark and I parted ways, it was clear that he would be hiking in the woods with his children before fall. Robin L. Silverman is the creator of the Take a Load Off!ª courseª which is available now as a downloadable course. It comes with a 30-day plan that will help you make a habit of happiness. You can also take advantage of teleseminars or private coaching, as you prefer. An expert in using the mind/body connection for happier living, Robin's books include The Ten Gifts: Find the Personal Peace You've Always Wanted from the Ten Gifts You've Always Had, and Something Wonderful is About to Happen: True Stories of People Who Found Happiness in Unexpected Places. For more information on her speaking and other services, see her website www.robinsilverman.com. Copyright © 2004 Robin L. Silverman |
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Aug 2004 |
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