| The Work & The Peace The EDGE Interview with Byron Katie by Doug Crandall Byron Kathleen Reid, a businesswoman and mother living in the high desert of southern California, became severely depressed while in her thirties. During a 10-year period, her depression deepened, and Katie spent almost two years seldom able to leave her bed, obsessing over suicide. Then one morning, from the depths of despair, she experienced a life-changing realization. Katie saw that when she believed that something should be different than it is ("My husband should love me more," "My children should appreciate me,") she suffered, and that when she didn't believe these thoughts, she felt peace. She realized that what had been causing her depression was not the world around her, but the beliefs she had about the world around her. In a flash of insight, Katie saw that our attempt to find happiness was backward -- instead of hopelessly trying to change the world to match our thoughts about how it should be, we can question these thoughts and, by meeting reality as it is, experience unimaginable freedom and joy. As a result, a bed-ridden, suicidal woman became filled with love for everything life brings. Katie developed a simple yet powerful method of inquiry, called The Work, that helped make this transformation practical. Since 1986, Katie has introduced The Work to hundreds of thousands of people in more than 30 countries around the world. In addition to public events, she has introduced The Work into corporations, universities, schools, churches, prisons, and hospitals. She will visit Minneapolis on January 14 for a public event, sponsored by The Learning Annex. To register, call (612) 943-9273 or 1 (888) 53ANNEX or visit www.learningannex.com. The cost of the course is $44, or $39 for members. There is a $5 discount for those who register online. Byron Katie, who has been described by TIME magazine as "a visionary for the new millennium" and by Eckhart Tolle as "a great blessing for our planet," spoke with The EDGE about her mission. You are appearing in Minneapolis on January 14 to present information on "The Work." What is it that you would like everyone to know about this topic? Byron Katie: That it works! That an unquestioned mind is the only suffering that a human being experiences. So when we question our mind, when we question what we believe, it leaves us enlightened, and the next time those thoughts come in, or that circumstance arises again, there's no stress involved. In fact, our arms are open and we understand it. Now that we understand the past, it makes sense, whereas before, it didn't. We question the mind and everything makes sense and we don't have to wait years for it. We can have it all day long, and immediately. In your book Loving What is, you have four questions that you claim can changes someone's life. Katie: It's the mind's key to itself. Can these questions be used by anybody, no matter their economic or political status in life? Katie: Anyone, anyone. Christians, Muslims, Jews, atheists. It's for everyone. That sounds exciting. These questions tend to require individuals to take a hard look at their internal thought processes. Katie: Yes, just grab one out of the air, and when you're feeling stressed you can just look at it and say "What is it I am so afraid of? What is the crux of the matter here?" You can write that thought down and put that concept up against the four questions and experience what could be as true or truer, leading to a much kinder life. Is it an important step for people to look at their own thoughts in their search for release from anxieties in this seemingly fear-driven world that we live in? Katie: Well, if they want to permanently deal with stress, Yes. Otherwise, we have the cigarettes, the alcohol, the compulsive overeating. We have the good looks, we have the "make the money thing," we have all of that. Those things mask the issues, and keep us entertained or busy. Until we question what we believe, we believe it! Absolutely. There is an Alanis Morissette song, "All I Really Want," in which she refers to people waiting for their next distraction. So these distractions tend to stop us from questioning our thoughts. Katie: Right. And that's a perfect word, distraction. Move me away from what I can't deal with. Move me away, distract me, because I can't deal with this. It's too rough. It's beyond my comprehension right now. And yet more and more people seem to be seeking for some purpose in their lives. How would you define your purpose, or reason for being here now? Katie: I am very clear about that, and that's to sit here and talk to you. That is my ultimate purpose right now. Any more than that I couldn't handle. Because any more than that, I'm not handling. I'd be distracted from talking to you. So your purpose does not go beyond this moment? Katie: Exactly. How can it? (laughing) I've heard this called the "Holy moment of now." Katie: Boy, oh boy, you may as well see it as holy. It is. And until we see it, we are stuck in an unquestioned mental world that we're believing, and that is not matching reality. Reality is where the grace is. It is the holy. Oh, I love talking to you! Why don't I interview you? I love talking to you, too! Now, you've got a very interesting story that you tell. Perhaps our readers would be interested in what single moment, or moments, caused you to devote your life to this purpose, and the The Work? Katie: I was lying on the floor one morning, which is where I slept. I would spend my nights on the floor because my self-esteem was so low I didn't believe I even deserved a bed to sleep in. I was very depressed. This one particular morning, a cockroach crawled over my foot. I opened my eyes and, in that moment, in place of all the darkness of my life, my unmanageable life, there was a joy that I cannot put words to. In that moment, I saw. I just saw. The reverse of what I experienced are these questions. In other words, people can take themselves back to the same experience that I experienced on that floor through these questions. Because in reverse, it gives them that experience. What I learned on that floor, the short version, is that when we believe our thoughts, we suffer. But when we question what we believe, when we question our thoughts, we don't suffer. The exciting thing is that I've come to see this is true for every human being. So what I do, in my life, I take these questions to any open heart that invites me, and that's what I've been doing for years and that's what I continue to do, because I know what it's like to have no way out. Those are powerful thoughts and many of us have been there, to feel that all is hopeless. Katie: And many of us are still there! Yes we are. Out of curiosity, did you take that cockroach and mount it and keep it above your fireplace? Katie: No, no, all of a sudden it turned into being as nothing as everything else. Do you think that all fears and anxieties are self-imposed? Katie: Well, innocently, yes. All of them. Totally, all of them. Right, it all starts with a thought. Indeed, we all started with a thought, somewhere. Katie: I like to say we're just a thought we think. Until we question what we believe -- our thoughts, as a human race -- we're like dinosaurs. When you find yourself falling back into a negative state of mind, how do you return to a state of balance? Katie: It has been a while, and what I would do is this: I would simply become very, very excited to find the thought, question it, and just be grateful that there's one left. It might be important to clarify for our readers that there is a difference between thinking a negative thought and actually believing them. We all have the thoughts that pop into our heads, but it's what we do with them that matters. Katie: Yes. What I say is that there are no new stressful thoughts. They're all recycled. In every country in the world, in every language, people have the same stressful thoughts. And we haven't dealt with them. Thoughts are like terrified children. We want them to go away, shut up, and do everything to get rid of them. But what if we just question them? Deal with them like we would our own children? Then the next time they come back, there's no stress. There's unconditional love. So I say: Let's meet our thoughts with unconditional love, because until we do, we cannot meet people with unconditional love, because they're going to say what we don't want to think. That's a difficult process to go through and a lot of people are afraid to look at their thoughts. They're afraid to delve to deeply. So The Work, and the four questions, help people along in this process? Katie: Yes! Because it's gentle, and it starts wherever anyone is. It starts where we are -- it begins there. It doesn't say we have to be in a certain spiritual condition or know something. We find the thought, no matter the religion or no religion. You just notice the thought, you question it, and out pops an identity that lives under what you believe. It's a whole new identity. It's like, "I am the woman who believes there's a problem." So I question what I believe and now I am the woman without the problem. That's a whole new identity. Each time we question what we believe, it leaves us kinder. Is there anything you would like to add, about your appearance in Minneapolis, or about The Work or your book? Katie: I'm very excited, and that The Work works, and for anyone who is so frightened that the only way they can come is in their pajamas, don't let that stop you. Everyone is welcome! To read more about Byron Katie, visit her website at www.thework.org Doug Crandall is an advertising sales consultant and manager of the Kansas City edition of The EDGE. Contact him at (763) 503-5328 or doug@edgenews.com Copyright © 2004 Doug Crandall |
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