| Leap of Faith by wendy Each night we die. And each day we are reborn. Boxing up the remnants of someone else's life makes me think about all of the non-essentials we surround ourselves with and are conditioned to collect. I sort through boxes and boxes of "stuff," trying to put definition to the chaos and order to the clutter. The house is full, but the life essence is gone. The one who made music out of this symphony of collectibles is no longer here to write the songs that wove them together. A heavy stillness fills the space. Rather than peace, I sense loss. The transition from manifest back to spirit is in process. The "what ifs" have finally been snuffed out. I am lucky. I hear what others don't. The former resident is with me in the house as I work. I am helping her to adjust. The death was unintentional -- an accident. That is a conflict, because the soul knew it was time. The personality is still adjusting. We talk. She is not gone -- just active on another plane. However, my information is little comfort to the boyfriend who longs to feel her physical touch and hold her one more time, this time with more feeling to let her know how much she will be missed. His grief is painfully obvious in the watery rings that circle his eyes. Because of his inability to prevent her death, he carries the added burden of guilt. However, it was not meant to be prevented. Death is necessary. She had me set aside things they had shared together to remind him of her life -- not her death. One is a book with two angels on the cover. He tells me one looks exactly like her. My ability is no comfort to the mother who just wants to see her daughter, to affirm in her presence her own life, or to the brother who had finally become close to a sister who, for most of his life, was out of reach. Each must work through his or her grief. The loss is real. It is part of the process. The only thing that will help is time and acceptance. Death is the final exit from the physical plane. Death is an illusion Because of my ability, I see death is an illusion. There is no death and no birth. We just change form to become spirit again. But while we are here, we must work with the illusion. Some of our discomfort with death stems from fear. Avoidance ensues and then we become disconnected with a process that is a very natural part of living. It is only when we are able to connect with death that we can fully relax and appreciate life. Life is. Death is. Our days are numbered, but they don't have to be finite. We can fill them with infinite possibilities for joy and love. Even from my limited contact, I have a wonderful sense of the spirit of this woman and who she was and is. I can understand the depth of her connections and the gravity of the loss. She was a light to all who knew her, and she is remembered for that, no matter how small or large her circle. Her impact was registered in the hearts and minds of others. They each carry a piece of her to live on through them in the manifest realm and, eventually, again in spirit. Love provides growth and expansion. We become more. As a channel, I connect others to loved ones now in Spirit. They are home, much like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz. Only a very small part of the soul is here playing the current role. The major player is still home, calling the shots. For me, those "others" are real. I sense them. I hear them. I see them. I feel them. And I am aware of many more. I am here to help remind those I am able to touch that there is no death. It is merely a change of form. In death, we reintegrate with Spirit to become more. However, each person must make sense of that for him or herself. I am not to try to convince anyone, rather, to offer my experience and my ability to make connections. Each person must come to terms with death in his or her own unique fashion. Or not. Joy for living As I go about my living and my dying, I want to remember it isn't how much money I have or what job I hold that has the potential for lasting value, but my joy for living and for taking time to share that with others on my path. Did I give them a smile -- or was I too self-absorbed and focused on my collection of "stuff" to care about the impact of my actions? Did I model love or did I just go through the motions? Did I live by someone else's rules or did I dare to write my own and to teach my children to do the same? If we want to see love -- we have to be love. If this moment is my last, to the best of my ability, I want it to be filled with love. I can only do that when I am love. What a great leap of faith we take to assume we will be given another day. Examined from within that context, if offers a whole new level of priorities. A lot of wonderful people who awoke with us today will be gone tomorrow. They will be missed, but they are not dead. They dropped their baggage and went home. Eventually, we will all join them and laugh at the joke that is life. Death is a return to joy! Even so, I plan to wait my turn and laugh while I am here. wendy is author of Divine Awakening and Random Sparks of Light. When life offers a wakeup call, transformation is an understatement. E-mail her at lite4one@aol.com. Copyright © 2002 wendy |
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